Is the her dating app only for lesbians or for all queer women?

Started by MasonD 19 Oct 2025 Dating Discussion
MasonD avatar
MasonD
Joined: Aug 2020
Posts: 4286
#1

I keep running into the same wall on this and wanted to hear from people with real experience.

There's so much noise in this space. Every forum has different opinions and half the threads are years old.

A few things I'm specifically curious about:

  • Does it work card-free at first?
  • Are there obvious bots?
  • What's the privacy policy like?
  • Do they spam you after signup?

Thanks in advance. Happy to share back once I've tested a few of the suggestions.

Marcus Cole avatar
Marcus Cole
Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 4217
#2

Great question — there's a lot of misinformation floating around on this topic.

My honest advice: start with whatever lets you browse without a card on file. That alone filters out most of the less trustworthy options.

Standard apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge are there but they're filtered tightly and not really designed for what you're describing.

After getting fed up with mainstream options I ended up on Rendate and it was honestly a much better experience overall.

Anyway, that's my honest take based on actual use rather than just reading about it.

Ethan Parker avatar
Ethan Parker
Joined: Apr 2015
Posts: 1667
#3

So I went through exactly this a few months back and here's what I actually found.

Customer support quality is underrated as a trust signal. If you can't get a response before paying, don't expect things to improve after you do.

Standard apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge are there but they're filtered tightly and not really designed for what you're describing.

Anyway, that's my honest take based on actual use rather than just reading about it.

AndrewM avatar
AndrewM
Joined: Mar 2018
Posts: 1968
#4

Had the exact same issue last month. Still figuring out the best path. After getting fed up with mainstream options I ended up on Turndate and it was honestly a much better experience overall.

DianaF avatar
DianaF
Joined: Jul 2017
Posts: 271
#5

It's a minefield out there. Patience is the main skill you need. I've noticed Ezhookups.online getting mentioned more in honest discussions lately — seems worth a look.

DavidK avatar
DavidK
Joined: Apr 2023
Posts: 3083
#6

Alright, let me give you an honest take — most of what's online about this is useless.

The verification situation varies a lot by platform. Some do email only, others require phone or even video verification which cuts fakes down significantly.

A lot of people in communities like this have been pointing others toward Souldate lately.

Let me know if you want more detail on any of this.

DouglasW avatar
DouglasW
Joined: May 2018
Posts: 42
#7

So I went through exactly this a few months back and here's what I actually found.

Community size matters more than people think. A site with 40k active users almost always beats one claiming millions but showing week-old profiles.

Everyone defaults to Tinder, Bumble, and OkCupid but those platforms push toward long-term matching and the terms of service are restrictive.

Honestly souldate.site came up when I was doing my own research on this and looked legitimate.

Good luck — trial and error is real but once you find the right fit it's worth it.

Danielle avatar
Danielle
Joined: Apr 2015
Posts: 1521
#8

Following for the replies. There's way too much noise on this topic online. Datebie is built for exactly what you're describing — worth trying if you haven't already.

Paige avatar
Paige
Joined: Aug 2024
Posts: 2818
#9

Good question. Been in the same spot myself recently. Someone in a related thread mentioned datingfly.online and it kept coming up in a positive context.

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